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Ever wondered what it's like to date Japanese men and women? How will culture affect your dating life?
This book explores the dating histories of 15 people of 8 nationalities, including straight and LGBT people. Some of them came to Japan because of their job, and others by choice, but they have one thing in common: struggling with dating Japanese men and women.
- Nadia, a black American woman, met her Japanese fianc� on a dark street when he approached her in a car.
- James, a white British man, saved a Japanese girl from a robber, and she became his first girlfriend.
- Sabina, a Russian model, talks about her sex life with her Japanese husband.
- Andre, a Jamaican man, married a Japanese woman for the promise of coming to Japan, which she didn't fulfil.
- Lily, a white American woman, realizes that there's one thing that most Japanese men have in common.
This book offers a peek into the private lives of people from all over the world who have found love in Japan. Their dating stories are full of errors, cultural conflicts, sexy times, lessons learned, and happy moments. The author, who grew up in Japan, offers a unique, cultural perspective on each story to elucidate the Japanese psyche.
Welcome to the exciting world of mixed dating in Japan!
- Sales Rank: #780810 in Books
- Published on: 2015-02-03
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.00" h x .58" w x 5.00" l, .55 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 219 pages
About the Author
Yuta Aoki is a Japanese author, blogger, and YouTuber. He writes about Japanese culture, multi-cultural communication, and dating.He is a chronic traveler. He has been to more than thirty countries, from Eastern Europe all the way across to Southeast Asia. He enjoys talking to local people and listening to their stories. His desire to share the best of these stories inspired him to write There's Something I Want to Tell You: True Stories of Mixed Dating in Japan. He dates internationally, although he s slightly worried that he might end up spending more time writing about dating than actually doing it.He was born and raised in Japan.
Most helpful customer reviews
10 of 10 people found the following review helpful.
Real stories about dating in Japan
By Nana
I was always interested in intercultural dating but it's rather difficult finding real stories about it..
This book gives a good insight for those who are interested in this topic (or especially dating in Japan)
I have to say I expected pretty similiar stories - but each story was so different from the one before
I can say there are also some surprising parts in each story ;)
Also I liked that after every story Yuta analyzes each story on his own view, and explaining cultural misunderstandings
Because cultural misunderstandings happen all the time and it's interesting to see how these couples deal with it
that's what I was the most interested in :)
6 of 6 people found the following review helpful.
Not just for dating.
By Dan Selakovich
I very much enjoyed "There's Something I Want to Tell You." While it is about dating, I think anyone that wants to understand the Japanese mind better could benefit. Even if not, it's a lot of fun to hear these real couples talk about real problems. Dating across cultures must be difficult, but dating a Japanese person, doubly so. There are so many minefields for the couples interviewed for this book, I'm surprised any worked out!
Being a bit obsessed with Japanese culture, I knew the Japanese had a rule for just about everything, and it seems that dating and relationships are no different. The trouble with these couples seems to start when the non-Japanese are vague in what the relationship actually is, or acts based on their own culture and not the Japanese culture. One rule is to define the boyfriend/girlfriend thing. I found this a bit ironic. The Japanese can seem so terribly vague to an outsider, but vagueness in a relationship? Forget it! Then comes the "kokuhaku", or the confession of love. While once in a relationship, the Japanese don't seem big on saying "I love you" to their partners, but the "confession of love" is the beginning rule of a relationship for most Japanese. Or so I grasped from these pages.
The part of the book I loved the most is Mr. Aoki's discussions, on a cultural level, of why each relationship had trouble or was eventually successful. I wish this part had been more in-depth so that I could understand my Japanese friends a bit better. There are so many vague verbal and non-verbal cues (at least to this American) in Japanese culture, that I sometimes find myself flustered or confused when interacting with Japanese friends. One American woman in the book called her ability to understand these cues in her Japanese husband her "automatic translator." So it's not just me then? Good to know! Perhaps Mr. Aoki's next book should be an "automatic translator guide to the Japanese." ;)
If the "Discussions" sections of the book had been more in-depth, I would have easily given it 5 stars. I would have also liked to have seen the experience of an older couple (most in the book, I gathered, are in their 20s and 30s). But please understand, that's based on what I wanted to know, and not necessarily within purview of the book. And if you are foreigner in a new relationship with a Japanese person, you really need to read this before it's too late.
6 of 6 people found the following review helpful.
Not what I expected
By Milenko
I expected much more from this book. Concretely, more on insights about Japanese culture in dating. It offers many great but general love stories, and with that it could be easily named "Dating in any country". Book has to contain more cultural insights about dating and marriage in Japan and in general more much more insights about Japanese culture. If you are looking for something really insightful, practical on dating in Japan, check the Jonathan Richards' book "Understanding Japanese women". Overall, I give 2 stars to this book because it's very well written and if you love love stories in general yoh might enjoy it.
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